


The Solitude of Unspoken Words

by stepOnMeZenos



Category: Final Fantasy XIV
Genre: Angst, Child Hien Rijin, Gen, Hien Rijin-centric, Implied Yugiri Mistwalker/Hien Rijin, Pre-Final Fantasy XIV: Stormblood
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-25
Updated: 2019-12-25
Packaged: 2021-02-26 00:55:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,879
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21674830
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stepOnMeZenos/pseuds/stepOnMeZenos
Summary: On the eve of his final stand against the Garleans, Hien finds himself lost in thought.
Relationships: Hien Rijin & Gosetsu Everfall, Hien Rijin & Kaien Rijin, Hien Rijin & Yugiri Mistwalker
Comments: 2
Kudos: 10
Collections: Final Fantasy XIV Gift Exchange (2019)





	The Solitude of Unspoken Words

**Author's Note:**

  * For [oneironym](https://archiveofourown.org/users/oneironym/gifts).



> Happy Starlight Celebration! :)

“Gosetsu,“ Hien asked, “why do the imperials call us savages?“

He had to tilt his head back to look the Roegadyn in his face, as he barely went up to his knees. Oh, he couldn't wait to grow up big and strong so he didn't have to do this anymore. Gosetsu was always nice to him, but did he have to be so tall? His head almost brushed the ceiling! And it wasn't a tiny room either. It was an office, with a big desk and a big window letting light into the room. It was build to fit anyone who needed to use it. And still Gosetsu was almost too tall for it. 

Gosetsu, kami bless him, knelt down on the tatami mats next to him before answering. “Shun, child… they are wrong to do so, but you must not question it for now.“

“But why _are_ they doing it if they're wrong?“ Hien crossed his arms. “It's rude. It's not something they should call other people.“ It wasn't at all like what his father had taught him. A leader should be kind to his subjects, polite and forthcoming. A leader's first and foremost responsibility was to take care of those under him. That was what his father always said. And yet, the imperials didn't act like that at all…

“I will answer you, if you wish. But first, you must promise me something.“ Gosetsu bent down and looked Hien in the eye. His eyebrows were furrowed, as if he was angry, but he didn't sound like that at all. Hien had seen Gosetsu angry once. He had yelled, then. He wasn't yelling now. 

“What is it?“

“You must not voice these concerns with anyone else except your father or me, and never when there are others around. If either of us tell you to be silent on it, you must do as we say. Do you understand?“

Hien tilted his head. Well, it wasn't really that odd. Both his father and Gosetsu had often told him not to speak to the imperials overmuch, as it wouldn't do to bother them with children's fancies, and his father had told him certain things in confidence he was not to repeat to anyone ever.

“I promise,“ he said. If Gosetsu thought this was the best way to go, then he would go along with it. Gosetsu was smart, after all. 

Gosetsu bent over even further. “The Garleans are not our rightful rulers, no matter what they might say. They have surely instructed you that they are—“

“—but they aren't, Father said so too,“ Hien finished, then flinched. Oh no. Father hadn't made an exception for Gosetsu. It was fine, surely it was, but…

Gosetsu smiled. “Do not worry. My Lord has told you not to speak of it, yes? I commend that, but it is fine. I will never rat you out to them.“

Good. Hien didn't want to get in trouble. 

“So,“ Gosetsu said, “you know they do not rule us, then. That is a good start.“

“But then why are they in control of everything?“

“They were stronger than us. I know you understand this. I saw you in the courtyard with the other children.“ Gosetsu chuckled. “You should not get into fights with them, but I would be lying if I said I was never in your position as a child...“

“I _almost_ beat them.“ Hien didn't want Gosetsu to think he had just lain down and taken it. No, he had fought back and he had been so close to winning, too. 

Gosetsu patted his head. “Yes, yes, I saw it all. You fought well. But you still lost. Do you know why?“

“There were too many of them.“ Hien remembered it well, the way they had cornered him in the courtyard. Told him he was a prince of nowhere, insulted his father. What else was he supposed to do except challenge them? One did not take insults against one's family lightly. 

“Exactly.“ Gosetsu nodded. “It was the same with us and the Garleans, see? They outnumbered and outmatched us. We couldn't stand up to them just like you couldn't stand up to those children.“

“My father told me some of that, but he also said I would learn more in my history lessons when I start taking them. I don't understand, though. You're so strong. How did you lose?“

The smile Gosetsu gave him didn't look as warm as his smiles usually did. “They were even stronger.“ 

“Oh. Then we just have to become stronger than them, right? Then they'll stop calling us names?“

“That… yes. Perhaps we will do that one day.“ Gosetsu laid a hand on his shoulder. “Until that day, be sure to study and train hard, and stay out of trouble, yes? And most importantly, don't talk of what we spoke of here today to anyone.“

“Of course not, Gosetsu.“ 

“Father,“ Hien said, “why were the imperials stronger than us?“

His father didn't answer immediately. Instead, he chewed some more rice while staring at the dinner table. Or maybe he just didn't hear? He had been so distracted lately that he had sometimes completely ignored Hien. He was a busy man, Hien knew that, but it had been so long since they had last played together. Almost an eternity.

“Father?“ he repeated. 

His father sighed. “I am sorry, Hien. This is not an easy question to answer.“ 

“Why not?“ Wasn't it a simple matter? Either you were stronger than someone, or you weren't, and if you weren't, it was because you didn't train hard enough. And nobody trained harder than his father or Gosetsu, so there had to be something the imperials had done to grow _even_ stronger. 

“The empire is vast,“ his father said. “I have told you that, have I not?“

Hien nodded. Bigger than Doma, he had said. Hien couldn't imagine anything that big, but it had to be true if his father claimed it.

“Because of this, there are many people living in the empire—many, many more than do in Doma. And that means they also have more people fighting for them, and more people to invent new weapons. You know what happens when one side outnumbers the other?“

Yes, Hien knew. It had happened the other day, with the other children. Which reminded him…

“But now there aren't so many imperials here, right?“ he asked. “We could throw them out of Doma, so you wouldn't have to do whatever they say anymore. I don't think you like doing what they tell you.“

“You've been thinking about this a lot, I see,“ his father said. “Remember not to talk to anyone about it, please.“

Hien nodded. Gosetsu was fine. He didn't need to mention he had told Gosetsu.

“One day, we will chase them out of our land.“ His father's voice was so low Hien could barely hear it. “I have no intention of grovelling under their heel forever. But now is not the time. We must prepare and bide our time until the opportunity arrives. And arrive it will. I promise you that.“ 

“I'll help you when it does,“ Hien said. “Then you won't have to be unhappy all the time.“ 

At that, his father finally smiled. He hadn't done that in a while. “You're a good boy, Hien. The best son I could ask for.“ He placed a big warm hand on his head. “I'll try to find the time to play with you again soon. I haven't been giving you the attention you deserve.“ 

“It's fine, father,“ Hien said. But he smiled back anyroad.

He had the best father in the world.

Hien adjusted his grip on his katana. Ever since his father had fallen prey to Zenos yae Galvus' blade, little anecdotes from his childhood had arisen from his memory. The small moments they had shared whenever they could, under the Imperial occupation. The happy and the sad. The good and the bad. Things he had forgotten up until now. Words he had wanted to tell his father, and now never would… 

'Twas part of the grieving process, he figured. A grieving process that would likely be cut short ere it could resolve naturally. 

“We've readied as many ships as we could, my liege.“ Yugiri's voice cut through his thoughts. 

He nodded. “You know what to do, then. See our people to safety.“ For possibly the last time, he gazed upon her face—a face he had grown fond of since the day she had first appeared in the House of the Fierce. There were unspoken words between them, too, that would never be uttered now, but such was life. He had not used any of the chances that had presented themselves to him to speak of how he truly felt, and now he would have to live with that choice. 

“Surely,“ Yugiri said, “surely someone else can lead our people? I would stay with you until the end. My place is by your side, my liege.“ 

It took every ounce of determination in his body to shake his head. “I would not trust anyone else with it. I must have the reassurance that they are in good hands, and none other than you will guarantee it.“

Yugiri lowered her head and fixed her gaze on the stone floor of the House of the Fierce—a subtle gesture he had come to know as her expressing dissatisfaction. “It isn't right, for a retainer to leave her lord behind.“

“And yet, it is what must happen,“ Hien said. Such a display of faith in him only served to harden his determination. His loyal retainer would not die here, mounting a final desperate assault on the Imperials to slow them down enough for the innocent to escape.

“By all the kami in creation, if I could stomp these Garlean curs out...“ The bitterness in her voice was palpable. 

Would that she could. Would that any of them could. 

Ere he lost himself in vain thoughts of what could have or should have been, he forced a smile on his face. “I will do it in your stead, then, as you will not be here to do it yourself. And then I will regale you with tales of my heroic exploits when we are reunited.“ In the afterlife, in all likelihood. But that was better than not being reunited at all, was it not?

“I… yes,“ Yugiri said after a moment. “I would like that very much.“

“Then let us not dally. Each moment we stand here is a moment that may cost us dearly later. Kami guide your steps, Yugiri.“ 

“...and yours, my liege. Hien.“ 

She left. Her footsteps echoed in the cavernous room, until they didn't anymore. 

Hien exhaled and rolled his shoulders. That was the last thing he had needed to take care of. Now it was time to go out and buy his people the time they needed.

And if he met the same premature end his father had at the hands of Zenos yae Galvus, then so be it. His life was a small price to pay for the safe escape of his people. 

A leader's first and foremost responsibility was to take care of those under him, after all.


End file.
